All We're Left With Are The Memories
by countrybutterfly
Summary: postRENT On Mark's final trip to the loft his memories send him back to shortly after Mimi's neardeath. Not the best summary...plz read
1. Here I Am

Prologue: Here I Am  
as told by Mark Cohen  
**_18 1/2 years after RENT ends  
_**28 June

* * *

I can't sleep, but lately that's nothing new.  
Instead, I give up the attempt and get out of bed. 

"_Mhmm_...Mark, honey? You okay?"

"Yeah, Go back to sleep."

"_Mhmmm_..."

I wait until I can hearher soft breathing before I leave the room. I crack open the door of the room across the hall enough to see that everything is fine in there and I can hear two sets of lite snoring.

I make my way further down the hall. I know the next two rooms are empty, but still I have to look...to know...

His room hasn't changed in seven years. I'm sure if he knew, he'd give me a lot of shit, but I don't care. The guitar still lies untouched on the unmade bed, and the pages of lyrics and pictures are growing dust thumb tacked onto the wall.

The room across from his is the hardest for me, especially right now. Everything in her room meant something to her; from her two favorite pillows, a dark plaid one and a plastic blue one, to the way she placed her pictures on the shelfs. On either side of her bed was a poster of his rock concert and the other was a poster for a film festival I once particpated in.

I look at the clock on the dresser.

**12:15**

She should be coming home, right now, hurriedly making no excuses but going straight to the apology for being late, for making us worry.

I shake myself.

She's home now.  
They both are.  
They all are.  
_Home for them justisn't here any more._

I leave the room and head down stair to the living room. The old film projector is brought out along with a couple of selcted rolls of film. I know I could just put in one of those DVD versions they had made for my birthday, but the projector has always been my prefered way to relive life. I lived through my camera and a relived it through the projector.

I set up the first reel.

_First shot_...Roger...that day.  
I watch as he sits on his normal perch, looking hopeful. It was one of the few times that Roger Davis had ever had any form of patience. He was waiting for her, but he didn't know that then.

The images play on going through the years.  
Christmas  
Her first birthday  
The last time we see Benny...but we didn't know that then...he was proudly showing off the baby.  
More funerals  
The wedding

I switch reels to a much more recent reel.  
The shot opens on a far off shot of her in what became her favorite spot in the last decade. She turns and sees that she is being watched. The film cuts to her and Roger playing a duet outside just after the move. She's laughing as he begins to comintates.

_Last shot_...the camera sits on her desk facing the bed. She is holding on to me as she cries. I can see now that I wasn't doing a very good job of being strong for her...I was more scared than she probably ever was.

I quickly shut off the the film, and lay against the couch

Morning comes too slowly. I quickly get ready, making sure that I don't wake anyone, then get in the car and head into the city.

I look at the clock

**6:48**

I'm early. I have time to go check on them.  
I arrive at my destination and walk to the familiar row.

"Hey." But I don't expect an answer.

My eys quickly go to each stone in the order they were laid in the ground.

**Angel. **

Benny

Collins

Mimi

Roger

And finally to the last stone. The dirt had only just been disturbed two weeks ago.

_**Lily Marie Davis  
February 26 1998- June 12 2016  
50 percent feline. 50 percent rockstar. 100 percent unstoppable.  
No Day But Forever Now**_

My cell phone rings.

"Hello?"

"Mark, it's Alison."

"Oh, hey. I'm on my way...I just had to make a quick stop."

"Alright. See you soon."

"Yeah."

I hung up. Well, here I go. It doesn't take me long to reach the building.

"Hey."

"Hey. How are they?" She asks, knowingly. She's accompanied me severeal times, and I know she goes on her own, as well.

I nod. "Same. Thanks for doing this."

"I just thought you would want to see it before it was gone."

"How's Thomas doing?"

"Fine, I guess. He's decided he wants to go by Tommy now, because it's what she called him. Other than that he has been very much his father's son."

She opens the door to the now empty loft. The windows have been boarded up and the light barely gets through the cracks.

I breathe and hold the camera to shoot.

_So many years and now all we're left with are the memories._

As I remember, as I relive, Alison disappears from beside me along with the boards on the windows. The old, worn out, and nearly broken furniture reappears. The smell of cigarettes and spilt alcohol seems to reappear. I look down, my camera looks less old, and my scarf is less frayed and my jacket is once again plaid and two sizes too big. And Roger...Roger emerges from the hallway. Plaid pants, green pullie, bleached hair and all; guitar in hand. He sets it up, preparing to tune the Fender. He looks up...past me...

"**Mark**!"

"_**Mark**_!"

* * *

**Author's notes"**

Okay, I know I said I wouldn't post this until I had finished "Maybe We'll All See" but I just got so excited. I don't mean to confuse anyone, but it will explain itself as it goes on.  
It's post-rent, and the rest of the chapters will begin at the point where Mark's memories have brought him...so it will be about 8 months after RENT in the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own RENT or anything that is copyrighted and currently owned by _somebody else_...hence why **I **don't own 'em...

* * *

_**until next time, this is me...signing out...**_


	2. Waiting For Her

Chapter One: Waiting For Her  
**18 years before the Prologue  
**  
_8 months after RENT ends

* * *

_

"**Mark**!"

"**Mark**!"

Roger yells at me.

"What?"

He looks at me and prepares to say something, then he stops and changes his mind, "Don't forget some cereal..."he finishes lamely before turning back to the guitar in his hands.

I sigh, "Roger? What?"

He doesn't answer.

"Alright, I'm going."

Once I shut the loft door I can hear him sadly playing her song. _Again_.

I know that's what he really wanted to talk about, not about damn cereal, it was Mimi. But, I'm almost glad that he didn't, what am I supposed to tell him? I'm just as clueless.  
They had one week, then she decided to get out of town to get clean...said she'd be back in a couple of months...

Yet, zoom in on the August sky...

I get to the Food Emporium and pickup the minimal required to survive, which conveniently fits into one bag, and head back.

I used to wish that he would just talk to me straight, I mean, what are friends for? But that has never been Roger's way. At least he doesn't store it all inside him; he's got that damn guitar. Everything he needs to say goes right into the music, but that doesn't mean he lets anyone know what it's about.

As I get closer to the building I can see a familiar Range Rover sitting out front. What's he doing here?

Then I see her get out, and then pull out her cargo. That can't be Mimi. No, she wouldn't have done that...not with him...she wouldn't do that with Roger. She enters the building, hmm...must still have her key.

I approach the car..."Wanting the rent?" I ask trying to sound cold.

He shakes his head, "No more rent, Mark, not anymore. If they're staying, you'll need all the money you can get. Just make sure he listens to her, okay?"

I nod, I think I nod, turn and enter the building.

I can see her slowly taking the steps and even though she's only a flight ahead of me, she doesn't see me.

I wait back as she knocks on the loft door...God, I feel like I'm spying on her.

She knocks and he doesn't answer. He won't answer; I'm not there to do it for him.

"Open the door, Roger."

That does it, he opens the door. She leaves the hallway, carrying the carrier with her.

There's a pause and then,

"You're running again."

I can't hear him.

But I can hear Mimi, its hard not to.

"Is she his? Does she look him, Roger?"

There is some talking that I can't hear.

"Then why the hell didn't you tell me?"

He found his voice.

I feel bad just standing here listening, but if something goes wrong...

"...I thought...after all the shit I did...I didn't...the doctor didn't think she would make it...and I didn't want to get your hopes up...when she was born...she was in intensive care for five months..."

"Does she have...?"

"They won't know until she's eighteen months at least."

Then it went by in another mumble of talk and I could only hear bits of it towards the end.

Would she stay?  
If he wanted.

Could he watch the baby while she went down stairs to get her stuff?  
Yes.

Mimi comes out, sees me and adverts her eyes. As she passes I reach out, stop her, and gently bring her into a hug.

"Welcome back."

"Thanks Mark."

I cautiously enter the door, but I doubt he notices. He is back in position on the table with the carrier beside him. He looks like he was trying to think, but in the middle of it got lost...confused.

I bring my camera up to shoot, and I get in some film of him sitting there.

"She says she still loves me." He says and then,

"He paid for it."

For once he's talking to me. I find myself surprised to hear not anger, but regret. Regret that he didn't know and that even if he had known, there was nothing he really could have done to pay for it all.

The baby starts to squirm.

He begins to reach for her, but stops, scared.

"She's so small."

Mimi reenters the loft with her stuff.

She attempts to smile, but she seems to lost some of that energy she had when Roger first met her. She looks liking she's treading on glass.

The baby begins to wail, but before Mimi has a chance to make it over, Roger just reaches in forgetting his fear.

"Shh, Shh..."

He looks to Mimi.

"Lily."

"Shh, Lily."

He gives Mimi a small smile, and the two of them seem to forget that I'm also in the room.

I watch them, just standing there for a few moments. This is just the start for them again. I guess this is just a new start for all of us.

* * *

**Author's Notes:**

We are now done with the second chapter/ Ch1 which _traditionally have always been my worst chapter_ to write. _**If there are major flaws I will rewrite it...just be nice when you tell me, please.**_

To clarify some things.

1) We have now gone back in time to shortly after RENT ends and will work our way into a full circle ending again at the same time as the Prologue.

2) Mimi was five months pregnant when she nearly dies...carrying Lily made her weaker, but Mimi didn't really know until shortly before. Because of the drugs, Mimi didn't think Lily would make it, therefore not telling Roger when she went off to get clean. Lily was born after only seven months in the womb and had to spend 5 months in neonatal intensive care unit, with everyone thinking she would die.

3) We'll find out more about how Benny got back involved in later chapters...as much I want to I can't give everything away in one chapter...

As to my knowledge on HIV/ AIDS in babies and children...I'm learning...I have been doing research so that I get my stuff right...the only problem is when I find sources that contradict each other over some of the smaller details...so what comes out here will be as accurate as the sources which I find...if you feel I'm not accurately portraying it, please nicely inform me and will take it into consideration.

I would like to thank:

**BwayDiva**: My first reviewer..again. Def. as it goes on...I was kinda going for that too.

**Harper's Pixie**: Yep, Thanks.

**Fortinbras**: And it's not done yet.

**L.M.Ward**: Any questions, just let me know...well, it's not so far in the future now for awhile

**HarryPotterFan**: Thanks

**carsonsheir**: Hopefully it won't...it might turn out like Maybe We'll All See...with a little of both thanks...

* * *

_**until next time, this is me...signing out.**_


	3. I Don't Have A Red Cape

Chapter Two:I Don't HaveA Red Cape  
_Two days after Chapter One

* * *

_

I shuffle out of my room and into the kitchen.  
It's only three in the morning, but after Lily's last fit, I hadn't been able to go back to sleep.  
Maybe some water will help.

"Couldn't sleep either?" I hear Mimi from the hallway.

I shrug, "Lot on my mind."

"You too?"

I offer her a glass. She takes it and smiles,

"Thanks."

A few moments of silence slowly drag by.

"You could have called." I whisper, not really sure if I want her to hear or not.

She shakes her head, "No...I couldn't, Roger...he..."

"You could have called me...I could have helped."

"You can't save the whole world, Mark."

I know that, my mind argues...but...but she is part of Roger's world and they're both part of my world. _Why can't I save my world_?

* * *

I'm gonna get out of here while I can, I want to get to work, well, my pathetic excuse for a paying job, while I can. 

As I shut the door behind me Mimi is fussying over Lily and hounding Roger with a thousand different rules for when she leaves to go job hunting herself while Roger attempts to keep his temper. They're about ready to continue the blame game they began earlier this morning.

The hours begin to creep along, hours of guiding pointless customers who can't read the signs, and hours stocking selves full of empty feel good movie that disillusion the people who spend ridiculous amounts of money to rent it when they can pay 5 dollars more to be blinded forever.  
America.

At noon I drag myself out of the store back towards the lofting almost regreting my promise to Mimi to check on Roger and Lily.

Some times I wish it could go back to how it used to be. Well, not the drug...before then...when life didn't suck. No, I guess life has always kind of sucked, but it used be kind of fun. When Roger, Benny, and I all "worked" at the decrepid store near the bar where the Well Hungarians played and death wasn't as inevitable.

Damn it, _why the hell is the door locked_?

"Roger?"

No answer. No problem, really. Juggle the door the right way, er...there we go.

"Roger?"

Still no answer. What the hell?  
Maybe he's asleep.

No, his room empty. Lily's make shift crib is empty.

Wait...the guitars gone too.

Roger who hasn't left the loft in ages of his own free will decides to pick right now of all the moments to disappear.

For some reason my mother's voice rings in my head, telling me that this is exactly how she felt when I disappeared in the grocery store when I was eight.

Don't panic he's a grown, resp...he's Roger. Shit.

The door shuts and I walk in the living room to find Roger, guitar strapped to his back and Lily attached to his front.

"Where the hell did you go?"

"What are you doing...?" He knows and his face show something between pissed and amused. "Ran out of diapers."

He shrugs and walks to Mimi's room to lay Lily down.

I've known Roger since I was ten, he has never been one to get something for himself.

He settles down on the couch ready to tune the beloved Fender, looks at me,

"Mark, go away."

He starts laugh.

"We're fine..."

"I...I, I know...Mimi..."

"I'm fine. We don't need a baby sitter or a super hero."

* * *

Author's Notes: 

As there was a question concerning this I thought I would clarify it broadly.

**Question:** How was Mimi five months pregnant and not showing when in your other story 'Maybe We'll All See' Ella is four months and is showing?

**Answer**: Simply, the drugs did play a major role. Mimi spent more time concerned with drugs that she did not feed her self properly there fore not nourishing Lily enough for a noticeably showable bump to be see (buyingd drugs not food), also while Lily was so sick when she was born. **_Or_** it could have been seen that she was showing it could be considered emanciation, is that word? (_When your belly protrudes from lack of nutrition_); but I'm probably going to use the first explanation. Also, in 'Maybe...' Ella had already been pregnant once with Kenna so it was easier for her to begin showing again. So, hopefully that helps explain it.

Rest of Review Responses:

**newrenthead**: did enjoy the opening of that review...thanks for the review

**L.M.Ward:** Dancing?...thanks for your two cents

**Kelby**: Hope you enjoy the path it takes

**HarryPotterFan**: I did...that why I am now confused...

**carsonheir**: fuzzy allows the reader to fill in some of the blanks...but hey, what can I say? you're right as always though on the other bit... Thanks

**DancingStarofOz**: Thanks. It's good to hear from ya...I hope the explanation helped some...I will admit it both shocked and made me furiously happy that you refrence Maybe We'll All See...Thanks agian.

**Matt**: Yeah, man...duh...no...I'm really bad at third person...but you knew that already. and that the point of the story...but you know I adore your opinion...

**Born2bBad**: 1: as to Benny, you'll see, that doesn't happen for a bit right now though. 2: I'm very happy to hear you like the tombstone, although I was a bit disappointed that no one picked up on the pillows...anyhow thanks!

* * *

_**until next time this is me...signing out.**_


	4. Always the Surprise

Chapter 3: Always the Surprise  
2 months since the last chapter Lily is now 8 months old

* * *

So, here I am. He called, I came. 

Curiousity killed the cat...

Thank god I'm not a cat.

I knock again, and suddenly there is a series of clicks before the door opens to reveal Alison.

"Mark." Simple, polite.

"Alison, how are you?" What exactly are you supposed to say?

"I'm fine, thank you. Let me go get Benny for you."

She smiles before she walks away. I don't think it was ever her that we hated, more her father, more the attention Benny gave her, the way he treated us in front of her.

Benny emerges from a hallway, "Mark! You came!"

Trust me, your not the only one whose surprised, but I keep my thoughts to myself.

He greets me as he would when we were still roommates, friends.

"Benny? How are you?"

"I'm good. Um..." he sobers...this could be bad.

"Lets go in here...I wanted to...talk to you."

He guides me to the living room, "So how's every one?"

"We're all good, fine. We're all working...except Lily."

He laughs like I cracked a joke.

"Look, Benny...what are you doing?"

We get up again and he guides me into a little room across form his...there's a crib.

"This is Thomas Andrew Coffin...Thomas for Collins, Andrew for, um...Roger, his middle name and all. He was born two months...after Lily."

We spend some moments in silence looking over the little boy who was laying asleep.

"Mark, I love Alison, and I love my son. But I loved all you guys too, you were my family. When I got married, I guess I figured things had to change. Tried to go back, but it was too late. But when Mimi called...it was Alison who answered. Meems apologized for whatever Alison might have thought about her and I. Maybe it was because they were both pregnant, maybe it was because neither one of them liked the situation they were in...but Alison was helping before I even knew...and well, here we are now."

"So, what is this, now? A peace offering? Reconcilliation?"

"More or less..."

"Why me? Benny, I'm not the one you need to convince."

"But you're the one who listens. Believe or not, Marky, you've been the family's core since we met. You're calm. You're steady. You don't judge until you have too. Besides, look at it...nobody gets a hold of Collins without him contacting you first, Roger, well...the world would have exploded if I had tried to talk to either him or Mimi first. And I wasn't going to the one who would sue my ass...and Maureen needs no explanation."

"You have a point...but, you're really going to try? No gimmicks, your word?"

"Absolutely, Mark."

"Your word's a bitt shaky with Roger..."

"Not this time."

He leads me to the front door, "I have a meeting I have to get to, but Mark, next week is Halloween...I want to have dinner, here...with everyone."

I nod and walk out of the apartment on to the and back home.

* * *

So its been a while,...too long...sorry about that... 

Well here's some answers...

Reviews are gratefully appriciated

_**

* * *

Until next time, this is me...signing out...**_


	5. Happy Comes First

Chapter 4: Happy Comes First 2  
6 February  
4 months after last chapter.  
Lily 1st birthday

* * *

The last four months have passed by uneventfully. Unless you count Roger and Benny being able to be in the same room with out going to war an event; personally, I consider it a miracle. 

Both Benny and Alison had made appearances, but today was Thomas Coffins first time in the loft.

As I see everyone has made it, I go back to my room and pull out the camera.

"Zoom in on Lily Marie on her first birthday." I narrate.

The little girl just stares for a moment before squealing, "arg," and then reaching for the camera.

"That her way of saying, 'Get the camera the hell away from me, Uncle Arg.'" Collins laughs at me.

'Uncle Arg' that's me.  
First came dadda, then momma, then arg...so we assume its me, when it comes to Collins it's 'oo' and she doesn't have any names for Benny though I'm sure her father could give her a list to choose from. But he's getting better.

"Close on Thomas Coffin...who is currently exploring the deep wild jungles of Joanne's hair."

Joanne looks at the camera, "Shut up."

I laugh and set down the camera and move to where Alison is helping Mimi cut the little cake she made this morning. I pull Alison,

"How are things?" She knows what I mean.

"With my father? Not so well. He taking more things out on Benny. Especially since he more or less wrecked the cyber arts plan and starting being around you guys again. My dad won't fire him, he loves me too much. And Benny's too proud to quit. It's in a stalemate. Benny's talking about moving into the bottom floor..."

"Okay, cakes ready." Mimi interupts the conversation and Alison leaves to go help again.

Roger holds his daughter on his lap and begins whispering in her ear, "Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday, my Lily, Happy Birthday to you."

She giggles happily. Quiete child.

I pick the camera back up, turn it on.

'Zoom on the happy family. Roger and Mimi watching as Lily begins to dig in the cake and finding she can use it as amuntion. Maureen and Joanne sit watching with Collins in the background. Alison leans agains Benny while he hold Thomas whose eyes have gotten big with the sight of food.'

For some reason or another I linger on the last shot.

Then _**Benny**_.

The camera _**stops**_.

* * *

Okay, short chapter before the next one.

* * *

_**Until next time, this is me...signing out.**_


	6. And Then There Were

Chapter Five: And Then There Was  
**2 April

* * *

I open the loft door just as the phone starts going off. I set my things down and wait for the answering machine to pick it up. A panicked voice starts in and I can hear crying in the background,**

"Roger? Mark? Are you there...guys please..."

I quickly grab the phone, "Alison? It's Mark."

"Mark is Benny still there?"

_Still there?_

"I'm sorry Alison, I just got home from work. One minute let me check..."

I set the phone down for a moment to look around, but all I find is a very asleep Roger and Lily.

"Roger...Rog, wake up."

"What?"

"Was Benny here?"

He looks at me, then the clock. "Yeah, about three hours ago."

Shit.

"Why?"

I look at him wearily. "Alison's calling, Benny hasn't come home yet."

He gently takes the sleeping Lily off his lap and after laying her down, goes to the phone,

"Alison? It's Roger, listen to me, he wasn't supossed to make any other stops? Okay, how about you write him a note, tell him to call here when he gets home. Then do you have someone who can drive you here? Okay, bring Thomas too, here to the loft. Okay?"

I spend the next twenty minutes watching Roger pace.

Back and Forth.

Back and Forth.

"Roger, why was Benny here in the first place?"

"He wanted to talk. Apologize..."

He fades as there's a knock at the door.

Alison comes in dishelved holding a sleeping Thomas and rambling faster than either of can comprehend.

"He said he had to...Roger alone...back...Thomas needed...dinner...his...and at eight...had this feeling...left...hasn't called...worried...what if...do you know..."

"Alison, I'm sure everythings okay...just wait here. Mimi will be home soon, but Roger and I are going to go see if made any other stops, and just make sure everythings okay."

I'm not sure I even heard myself.

She nods.

As we head out Roger tells her that Lily is in the back and she can lay Thomas in the crib if she wants, but she clings to her son.

We head out to the street, and I look to Roger, "Where do you think we should start?"

He shrugs and I follow him down the street, past the empty loft, and finally not to far from where the Cat Scratch Club is...

"Fuck!"

I hear Roger's voice first, then I see...

_"...We are gathered here together to celebrate the life of Benjamin Coffin the Third...a husband, father, son, and friend..."_

It shouldn't be Benny, I can see it everyone's faces. Sure, he was an ass for a while...but nobody deserves this.

**Benjamin Isaac Coffin the Third, 25, died on April 2, 1999 on his way home...**

_"...he had a promising future. I was always proud of my son, and as he got older I could only becom prouder..."_

It's like in a movie when you don't think they're going to kill off one of the characters becuase they've already killed off so many others. Life isn't like that.

**... He was a successful business man who also explored creative eneavors in his free time...**

_"...I didn't see it until it was too late; he might have become a business man, but he always held onto the passion he had when I knew him in high school..."_

If you look through the papers...at the obituaries..., and see someone who was young it's almost instinctive to look for the why. Sure the papers say if it was a car accident or cancer, but never the attacks by strangers with baseball bats who get adrenaline rushes from watching people suffer.

**...A long time resident of the New York area, he leaves behind his father, two younger brothers, sister, wife, year-old son, and numerous friends...**

_"...He was a loyal friend. You could hate him, but he still loved you..."_

I guess on some level you expect everyone to die...it's just the details that catches you by surprise.

**...A memorial service will be held on April 4th at 5:00 p.m. with the funeral on April 5th at noon. In lieu of flowers the family asks for donations towards community improvement and medical research...**

_"...he always believed in investing his time; that with effort you could achieve your dreams in ways the rest of world saw as 'practical'..."_

In a moment of philosophical thought too deep for my normal thoght process, maybe the reconciling was some timed, fated thing...on some level he knew...but on the other hand...

**...He was loved and will be sorely missed.

* * *

Okay on that note.**

Just in case you need it; in the 2nd bit with all the formatting the regular was still Mark's commentary, the _italics were the people speaking at the funeral (the priest/minister, his father, Roger, Mark, his brother), _**and the bold was the obituary.

* * *

**

_**Until next time, this is me...signing out**_


	7. All Because Of Her

Chapter Five: Simpler Memories Two years later 

Lily's diangonsis was something we had expected but we had all hoped against. Roger and Mimi took it hard, who wouldn't...knowing something like that. But what was surprising, to me at least, was that Mimi took it worse than Roger. Roger took it more in stride, talked about it and pulled Mimi out of her own blame to focus on their daughter. Actually, the bigger picture was: he had changed. It might have been something during the time after that Christmas, and it could have been Lily herself. Lily had an effect on all of us, but Roger more than any one.

* * *

I could hear the laughter and music as I climbed the stairs.

I pull my camera out of the bag before I slowly open the door.

Close on Roger playing to his favorite audience.

He sits on top of the metal table looking down on the three year old twirling in a dress that Mimi had sewn together from the stuff in her own closet. Lily stops and stares at her father.

"What's the matter Lily-bug?"

"Dance, Daddy."

"With you? Then who will play the music."

She just laughs, "Dance, Daddy."

He smiles sets the guitar aside, hops off the table and offers his hand. She puts her smaller one is his. He pulls her up a little so that she has foot on each of his feet and after taking both of her hands are in each of his they twirl about without noticing me. The only music is the song Rogers singing and the sound of Lily's giggles.

"Daddy, you tall."

"Yeah, Lily-bug," Roger laughs, "It's what happens when people get older."

"Okay."

The camera runs out of film as Roger finally spots me.

"Look, Lily."

"Uncle Mark!"

She comes running at me like she hasn't seen me in ages. In the background Roger puts the guitar in his case, getting ready for the gig tonight.

"Lily-bug, daddy's got to go...be good for Mark, Okay?"

"Okay."

"And no sugar."

"Aw" She turns and pouts at him, a trick she learned from her mother.

He smiles and comes to tosses her in the air, "Okay, just a little."

"Okay." She smiles, realizing she got her way.

As if on cue when he close the door on his way out minutes later, Lily plops in front of the door: he's forgetting something. Seconds later he flies back in, bends down, and kisses the top her head.

"Love you, Baby girl."

"Love you too."

And he's gone again.

She looks back at me and smiles. We both know.

She climbs on the couch and leans against me as I sit down. She falls asleep waiting for Alison to bring Thomas up. I look at the little girl sitting next to me for a few moments.

I've known Roger for, well, awhile. And I don't how, but after all the years of trying to get him to listen, among other things...all it took was this little girl.

The door slides open and Mimi walks in with Alison and Thomas, bearing food.

"Where's Lily?" Mimi ask.

I point to the sleeping child next to me.

Later that night, I heard the door shut..signaling that Roger was home, which was confirmed as I heard Mimi in the room across from mine.

"Hey, how'd it go..."

"Not my favorite audience."

_All because of one little girl._

* * *

_**Until next time, this is me...signing out.**_


	8. All The Little Children

**Chapter 7**:_All the Little Children_  
Six months since last chapter.

* * *

"But I wanna stay here." Lily throws herself on the ground.

Roger tries to pick her up, but she is determined to stay on the ground.

"Lily-bug, we're just moving down stairs."

"I...Don't...Wanna."

Roger sighs showing early signs of getting tired of the dealing with her whining.

"Lily Marie Davis, you're coming downstairs!"

"No."

"Yes."

"No!."

The two of them stand there facing eachother in some sort of draw. Lily, to her credit, has been this equally determined about staying here since her parents told her.  
Mimi and Roger wanted their own space, and with Collins getting fired and becoming weaker we figured he could move in here again.

The door opens and in comes 'The She-Herd', as Roger likes to refer to them when they all arrive together. Mimi, Mo, Joanne, and Alison stand there with mixed emotions of boredom and amusement.

"What's the matter?" Mimi asks, trying to stifle an 'I told you so' look.

"She won't go downstairs." Roger muttered in reply.

Maureen laughed from behind Mimi, "And whose the adult here?"

Roger tossed his back to stare at her, "Shut up, Mo."

"Yeah, shut up, Mo!" Came from the little girl.

Mimi's eyes widened, and Joannne ducks behind Alison to hide her laughter.

"Lily Marie Davis, say your sorry."

"No!"

"Yes."

Here we go again.

"Mommy? Uncle Collins is here." We can hear Thomas slowly coming up the stairs.

The little girl on the floor's head comes up swiftly and I turn my camera on her. Thomas comes in a spots Lily on the floor and smiles...one of Benny's smiles.

"Mommy, can I go see Lily's new room?"

Roger looks at the little boy, "Lily doesn't want..."

"Shhush! Daddy." Lily promptly gets off the floor, finger over her mouth then walks to Thomas, grabs his hand and leads him out.

The group of us stare in disbelief before we hear, "Daddy! We can't get in."

Roger still doesn't move.

"Daddy!"

And he's out the door, passing Collins who is pointing towards, "Lily and Thomas?"

"Uh-huh." I mutter

"Aren't they like four?"

"Uh-huh." Comes Mimi's reply.

"Well, every little kid has a best friend." Maureen sighs.

Well, at least they're only four.

Collins walks up to me and we embrace, "Hey, Mark."

"Hey, how you doing?"

"Fine. I'm getting my old room right?"

"Uh-huh."

* * *

**Six months later.**

Mimi and Alison are holding their respective child on their laps in the church. Roger sits next to Mimi, while looking at me fighting tears in his eyes.

"Too fast." He mouths.

I nod.

Thomas looks up to his mom, "Mommy?"

"Uh-huh, baby?"

"Why are you crying?"

"Becuase Mommy's sad."

"Why are you sad?"

Alison tries to smile patiently at her son, "Because Uncle Collins is gone. Aren't you sad, honey?"

The little boy shakes his head.

"Why not?"

"Because now Daddy has more comp'ny in heaven."

He turns back around and rest his head against her chest.

It's heard knowing where we are at. Why. Somethimes I just wish it would all stop, just for Lily and Thomas' sakes. That's all. Just to stop for a moment.

**_

* * *

_**

**_Until next time, this is me...signing off._**


End file.
